So what am i chasing? I’m hollow inside trying to complete myself by running around chasing things that I think will coat me with sophistication, skill, talent. I still don’t feel complete. Question, what am I chasing?

One minute something matters the world to me, the other, there it goes out of the window.

There’s always a tussle, always, between these two people inside me. The one that’s dying to just live and the one that’s dying to teach me how to live. The one that keeps showing me the rear view mirror in the future and the other that becomes my windscreen. I feel like i’ve lost friends, family, social connections, everything that i was ever proud of, to chase something that I don’t know where i’ll find. Heck, I don’t even know what it is. So, what am i chasing?

I run away from the ones who want to love me and I want to love the ones who are running away. So what or who am i chasing?

I guffaw at people who just live life without a purpose and I look at myself with pride thinking i’m on track. Just the other moment, when I’m down or disappointed, those people seem to mock me.

I’m galloping ahead with a purpose or so I think, only to realize that my achievement seems ever so minimal in front of this ever increasing universe. I’m running. To catch up, to split, to run, to overcome, to focus, to get distracted, to live. Only to see my life left behind. So, what am i chasing?